


feeling lost and found

by writer_inthe_dark



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Like, No Incest, Sibling Bonding, a lot of angst followed by a lot of fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-27
Updated: 2020-02-27
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:14:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22916050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writer_inthe_dark/pseuds/writer_inthe_dark
Summary: Diego’s life was in shambles. He had been booted from the police academy, dumped by his girlfriend and kicked out of their (her) apartment. As he sneaks into his childhood home to try to get his life back on track, he overhears a dangerous secret. Can he get Luther out of the house before it’s too late?Luther doesn’t trust Diego. Diego had never cared for him before and has no reason to now. But after a few too many coincidences, he starts thinking over Diego’s warning. Could Diego be telling the truth? Why would Dad be trying to hurt him? What is Luther supposed to do?A story of love, discovery, and learning what it means to be a family.
Relationships: Diego Hargreeves & Luther Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves/Eudora Patch
Comments: 8
Kudos: 30





	feeling lost and found

Diego flung into the parking lot and stopped his car with a hard slam on the breaks. He sat in place for a moment, taking fast angry breaths while clenching and unclenching his fists. Fuck.

He really fucking blew it. He stomped out of his car and swung the door shut with a _SLAM!_

He just _had_ to use false identification on his police academy applications. Of _course_ he did. He figured the worst thing in the world would be everyone going around and calling him dumb names like _“The Kraken”_ or _“Number Two”_. But it turns out _no._ The real worst thing would be getting into the academy under a false name and feeling like you had a shot at doing what you loved, then suddenly getting kicked off the force for it. 

God! All he wanted to do was forget his childhood ever even happened and to just _move on._ He was twenty-years-old and yet, the only thing people ever want to talk about when they meet him is the fact that he used to run around in fucking spandex as a thirteen-year-old stopping bank robbers. 

He hated their questions. No, he hadn’t seen Allison’s new movie. No, he doesn’t know about whatever bullshit mission Luther was on the news for. No, he hadn’t heard Klaus was arrested. No, he doesn’t know what happened to Five, so _stop fucking asking about it._

God, he hadn’t even stepped foot in that house since he turned eighteen, but no matter what he did, he couldn’t escape it. He leaves home and gets a job waiting tables; shit headed customers ask him to throw butter knives all over the fucking place. He tries to rent an apartment; all landlords think he’s playing some prank when he signs his name “Number Two Hargreeves”. He gets a fake I.D. to actually have a chance at getting in the police academy; he gets kicked out and threatened with legal action.

It doesn’t make sense. He was in the academy for _months_. He was weeks away from graduating and being a full member of the force! Why wouldn’t they notice before now? Things were going so well. He had moved out of the stupid boiler room he was staying in and moved in with his girlfriend Eudora. He finally was going to get a job where he felt useful, where he could help people. 

But somehow everything in his life finds a way to fall apart.

He made it to his front door and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath before stepping inside. He walked in to see Eudora on the phone with someone, eyebrows furrowed and jaw clenched. She looked up as he stepped in, muttering, “Gotta go.” Diego threw his keys on the kitchen counter and faced her.

“Why did Beaman just call me saying you’ve been kicked off the force?”

Diego took a deep breath, “Probably because I just got kicked off the force, Eudora.”

Eudora blinked at his tone. Diego clenched his jaw. He was not in the mood for this conversation right now. He wished he could have just one moment of peace before life sent another punch his way. Fuck! And Eudora looked _angry._ This was not going to be one of their usual spats. They often teased each other or “argued”, but it was always lighthearted banter. This though, this was real. And Diego didn’t know how to handle that.

“So was he right that you used a fake I.D. on your applications? What the hell, _Diego?_ Is that even your name?!”

 _“Yes, it’s my goddamn name!”_ He snapped. He took a deep breath and ran a hand down his face. He needed to calm down. It wasn’t her fault. He took another breath as Eudora threw up her arms and started up again.

“Why the hell did you use a fake I.D.?! In what possible scenario would that be okay?! That’s a _felony,_ Diego! You know that!” 

Diego looked at her, conflicted. He was fired up but he didn’t want to fight. How could he explain this, though? He had been lying to her. He hadn’t told her about his family. He hadn’t told her about his past. He had even told her a fake last name! There was no way to make this right.  
He swallowed and tried to figure out how he would explain this to her.

“Okay...Do you remember The Umbrella Academy?”

She raised her eyebrows to match her unamused tone as she flatly said, “Do I remember The Umbrella Academy.”

_“Yes.”_

She clenched her jaw, patience wearing thin, “Yes.”

“Well, um,” Diego pulled a knife out and began twirling it between his fingers. A nervous habit. He didn’t know where to start, “We, uh- That was-” He huffed. He sounded like an idiot. He just needed to say it. He took a deep breath, “That was me and my family.”

Her brows narrowed, “What.”

“That was me and my siblings,” he sighed. “I know I told you my last name was Herrera but it’s Hargreeves....I just hate it when people know who I am. I mean, legally my name is Number Two! Do you think anyone at the police academy would take someone named ‘Number Two’ seriously?! It’s a fucking joke!”

He looked up to see Eudora began pacing back and forth. He couldn’t read her expression. His mind raced for something to say. Is there a way to make this better? He fucked up and doesn’t know what to do. He just wants to curl up in Eudora’s arms and forget this crappy day but he _can’t._

Eudora stopped to look at him with a furious expression for a moment before throwing her hands up in the air and exclaiming, “I just feel so stupid!”

Diego’s brows furrowed as he stepped forward to put a hand on her shoulder, “No, it’s my f-”

She jerked back, “Don’t touch me!”

He recoiled as if slapped. She continued, “I mean, God, Diego. I’m trying to become a detective one day and I can’t even figure out that my boyfriend was a famous superhero? Seriously?”

She bit her lip and swallowed, carrying on in a softer voice, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want anyone to know, everyone always-”

“Okay, but why didn’t you tell _me?”_

He took a breath. That was the million dollar question, wasn’t it? When they had met, he introduced himself as Diego Herrera. Why shouldn’t he? He didn’t know her. He didn’t trust her. He had absolutely no reason to tell her anything about his past.

But then he started falling for her. Hard. How could he not? She was strong, smart, intimidating, everything he could ever want in a woman. They were the top two trainees in the academy. They were both incredibly competitive, which led to some good old fashioned trash talk. Beneath it, there was an attraction that was impossible to ignore. Their competitive ribbing would be layered with more and more flirtatious energy with each interaction, and soon enough, they were locking lips in the back of a cruiser. It was fiery, it was passionate, it was amazing.

But it was _terrifying._

Her soft lips on his. Her hands through his hair. Her breath on his skin. She was _everywhere._ And it was hot and exciting and fantastic, but he had never _done this before_. He had never even held hands with a girl before, much less _this_. So as her hands made their way across his chest and started unbuttoning his shirt…

He froze.

He can still remember the feeling as she pulled back, picking up on his hesitation. She slowly allowed her eyes to flutter open, and Diego felt his face flush further because she was so _beautiful_ and she asked, “What’s wrong?”

“N-n,” Diego tried to respond but the word kept getting caught in his throat, “It’s n-”

He took a harsh breath and cleared his throat.

_Picture the word in your mind._

“Nothing. Nothing’s wrong.”

Her eyebrow quirked up at that. He swallowed, feeling like he had blown it, but then she softly said, “Hey,” and he looked up to see her deep brown eyes filled with sincerity, “You can tell me.”

“Nothing’s wrong, it’s just,” He could feel his face heating up. He swallowed his shame as he quietly said, “It’s just that I’ve never done this before.”

Shock crossed over her face and she let out a surprised, “Oh.”

He grit his jaw, feeling the weight of rejection settle on his chest, but then she slid her hand into his. He looked up to see her smiling softly at him and she said with a twinkle in her eye, “Well then I guess we’ll have to take this slow.”

He felt his own face break into a smile, “I guess we will.”

And they did…

Sort of.

They had officially been seeing each other for a little over two weeks when she stopped by his place for the first time. She took one glance at the boiler room gym basement he was living in and declared that he was moving in with him, and he wasn’t about to argue with that.

So...slow _ish._

Diego had never been happier. He would never say it out loud, but his heart still flutters everytime he hears her refer to him as her boyfriend. Or when he gets to say, 

_“Oh, this is my girlfriend-”_

_“I’m Diego, her boyfriend-”_

_“Me and my girlfriend were going to-”_

And in the mornings, their alarm will go off, waking him from a peaceful sleep. And Diego will wrap his arms around her with a _“Goodmorning, sweetheart.”_ And she will respond with a grunt because she absolutely hates mornings, but he gets up and makes them both coffee. And she will wander out, rubbing the bleariness from her eyes, her hair a bed-headed nest and looking _beautiful._ And he just has to stop and stare because he was so _lucky_ and he never thought he’d be this happy.

But he never told her. 

He never told her about his past.

He was scared of ruining it. 

He was scared of breaking the one good thing he’d ever had.

So he never told her.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

He looked up at her now and saw her expression. It wasn’t anger anymore. It wasn’t frustration. It was _hurt_. He had done that. He had hurt the one person he was never supposed to hurt. And he had no idea how to make it better. 

“I don’t know,” he whispered.

He grit his jaw to try to bite back his tears. He wasn’t allowed to cry. This was his fault. He would be selfish to cry, because then Eudora would feel some sympathy for him. He didn’t deserve sympathy. He ruined this and he deserved her anger, pain and hatred, not her compassion. So he swallowed the lump in his throat and tried to keep himself together.

“I feel like I don’t know you, Diego. I mean, everything you’ve told me about yourself is a lie! Why-” She cut herself off and looked at him with big, pleading eyes, “Didn’t you trust me?”

“Of course I did,” he whispered, pained.

“Then why didn’t you tell me?” Her voice was hushed tears filled in her eyes. 

“I-”

_I didn’t want to lose you._

_I didn’t want you to see how fucked up I really am._

_I didn’t want to ruin the one good thing I’ve ever had._

“I don’t know.”

She sucked in a breath and a tear slid down her cheek. He wanted to wrap his arms around her, to tell her he was sorry and stupid and wrong, to protect her from the world. But he couldn’t. So he watched as she turned away from him and wiped the tears from her face. He watched as she took a shaky breath and spoke in a hollow voice, “I think you should go.”

Diego finally allowed his own tears to silently fall and with them, his heart fell too. He looked at her small frame as she sniffled and wiped the tears from her face.There was a tightness in his throat that wouldn’t go away. He felt completely frozen to the spot. He swallowed once, twice, then a third time. He took a shallow, shaking breath, nodded, then walked out the door.

It was stupid to think he could ever be loved.

**Author's Note:**

> :( SORRY!  
> anyways lol i actually made a tumblr post outlining this entire story, so if you want to see major spoilers check out @narwhalnation  
> LMAO but I made that post at like 3 am and it is very jarbled and all over the place and im already planning on changing some things so...yeehaw  
> COMMENT WHAT YOU THINK!! I literally thrive off your comments!! send me feedback lol


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